Leading Adults Well… Some Reminders

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I have a hunch that as a reader of this blog you lead adults and care about their ongoing development. With my “Practical Pam” hat firmly on, let me encourage you with my top three non-negotiable adult learning tips. You will notice similarities between them.

 

I challenge you to identify an upcoming adult meeting, small group, or important gathering, thinking about how to integrate these strategies as you lead.

 

1. Ask and Include.

Resist the urge to be the answer-man/woman. There is so much more to be gained by asking and including participants’ input before you begin, when you gather, and all along the way. “Why did you choose to come? What expectations do you have? What will make this a good use of your time? What do you hope for?”

 

In the process of including others through our questions we gain so much more than answers. We demonstrate our ability to listen, earn respect, observe, build enthusiasm, show that we are in this together, and create a warm, safe, trusting environment.

 

2. The power of dialogue.

A couple of statements we repeat around VP3 are, “conversation creates culture” and “the answers are in the room.” Both mandate a way of being together that put a priority on contribution from everyone, through a process of questions, reflection and generous conversational space.

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Paying Attention…

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“Teach us to number our days,

That we may gain a heart of wisdom.”

Psalm 90:12

Short thought this time…

 

A few weeks ago I was leading two Facilitator Retreats; one in Olympia, Washington and two days later in Warwick, New York. I found myself emphasizing to both groups of pastors and lay-leaders the importance of caring for themselves,

 

“Taking care of yourself is not selfish. In fact, as a person who is leading others, it is one of the least selfish things you can do because you cannot care for others well if you have not taken proper care of yourself. Not for very long, at least.”

 

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It didn’t hit me the first time I said it. It took me hearing myself say it to others a second time before I stopped myself and I took notice. Then, when I got home from that week of two Facilitator Retreats, my pastor preached on Psalm 90:12.  Two days later, during our VP3 Team Meeting, Pam’s focusing thought revolved around Psalm 90:12…

 

I think God is reminding me to pay attention to something. I guess I better take my own advice and clear some space so I can better perceive what He is saying!

 

Perhaps you do too…

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Seeing The Tree in the Forest

It is quite a deal when you discover something new from something familiar.  You may have driven by that section of the forest a 110 times, and yet this time you noticed that one particular tree slightly hidden but somehow on this one day more obvious than all the others.  The unique color and type set it apart from the rest.  It is so obvious.  Makes you wonder why you had not really seen it before.  Your perspective of that familiar bush is slightly and refreshingly different because of the one very obvious tree that caught your attention.

 

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It is helpful from time to time to take a closer look in order to see the tree in the forest.  And when we do it often has the capacity to change the way we see the forest, making it seem refreshingly new.

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Adults Want Help With Spiritual Growth…What’s Your Next Step?

I would like to have a dollar for every conversation I have with a friend, a facilitator of one of the VP3 processes, a pastor or leader, and even with myself, around “what are you thinking about for next steps?”

 

Deep in the DNA of my spiritual life, and therefore the lens I see others’ personal spiritual DNA, and also the “BIG C” life of the church, is that we ought to be thinking about our next steps for growth. There are always next steps. Jesus talks about things that grow all the time. There is an expectation that we, too, will grow. And in my language, I’ve adopted the words, “What are your next steps?”

 

To a friend it may sound like, “So, what’s your next move?”

To a facilitator of The Journey process, “Are you helping each of your group participants think about their next steps after The Journey concludes?”

To a Pastor and church leader, “Are you thinking about your church’s next steps for adult spiritual growth? Do you find yourself thinking about some kind of pathway for that growth?”

 

Let me pull back the curtain on ways we may find our selves thinking about next step conversations.

 

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Soul Care

IMG_4283For many years I’ve been wrestling with the conundrum of moving forward safely on a beautiful hiking trail, while at the same time paying attention to the beauty of God’s creation all around me.

 

I am declaring here, that it cannot be done.

 

You must choose.

 

Forward steps OR paying attention.  

But not both at the same time.

 

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“co-editing” our story…

I_Want_You_blank_Uncle_Sam_0“Promotion & Recruitment” is my title at VantagePoint3.  To be completely honest, when I first started in this role, I very strongly disliked (bordering on hated) my title.  I was fine with the “Promotion” part.  It was the “Recruitment” part of my title that I did not like.  One part of my role is connecting with new pastors and churches and inviting them to partner with us.  Technically, that is the definition of “Recruitment.”  However, who wants to talk to a “recruiter”?  I felt as though that title had a negative stigma attached to it.  A “recruiter” is someone who wants something from you…you meet with a recruiter to “sign your life away.”  I often wondered how big of a hindrance that title would be…how big of a barrier it would be to beginning a conversation.

 

In the last couple of months I’ve developed a new passion for both the “Promotion” & the “Recruitment” parts of my title.  I have a desire to reverse the negative stigma associated with the word “recruiter.”

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…they ate & were filled…

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In those days, the multitude being very great and having nothing to eat, Jesus called His disciples to Him and said to them,  “I have compassion on the multitude, because they have now continued with Me three days and have nothing to eat.  And if I send them away hungry to their own houses, they will faint on the way; for some of them have come from afar.”  Then His disciples answered Him, “How can one satisfy these people with bread here in the wilderness?”  He asked them, “How many loaves do you have?” And they said, “Seven.”  So He commanded the multitude to sit down on the ground. And He took the seven loaves and gave thanks, broke them and gave them to His disciples to set before them; and they set them before the multitude.  They also had a few small fish; and having blessed them, He said to set them also before them.  So they ate and were filled, and they took up seven large baskets of leftover fragments.  Now those who had eaten were about four thousand.

Mark 8: 1-9 (NKJV)

 

A few weeks ago I read Mark 8.  For some reason this story captured my as it never has before.  I promptly turned to Matthew 15, Luke 9, and John 6 to read the other  Gospel accounts.  Since then, I have not really been able to read beyond this.  It captured me and I’ve continued reading all 4 of the Apostles’ accounts…

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A Pathway For Adult Development

19 years ago I followed a nudge to do what I could to help pastors and the leaders in local churches pay greater attention to the development of their adults.  At the time I knew part of the concern was a leadership one, and so much of what I put my hand to was couched in the language of “leadership development.”  And, in some respect, I was on to something.

 

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A New “Journey” Conversation…

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The Journey has changed the way I think about my role as pastor.

I have a greater boldness about my mission and calling.”

 

In a recent coaching call with our Sioux Falls The Journey Facilitator Retreat crew, we heard great testimonies of the impact already being felt and seen within Journey groups across South Dakota, Iowa, and Minnesota.  At a point in the conversation when the facilitators were talking about how the process was impacting them, the above quote is how one of the pastors replied.

 

I took the opportunity to talk with that pastor and I asked him if he would be willing to answer a few questions and share about his experience implementing The Journey in his church for the first time…

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Formation for Mission

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I had the privilege of attending and leading a workshop at the Apprentice National Conference 2014 last week in Wichita, Kansas.  The theme of this year’s conference was “Formation for Mission: Becoming the Change our World Needs”.  It was a great couple of days spent with around 250 others with the same shared vision of participating in God’s transforming work in the world, wherever we are. 

 

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